From the ugly duckling to the light at the end of the tunnel

Well, I always considered myself the ugly duckling: no artistic talent, no perfect look, no dreams to reach stardom... But I had to go to University so that I can earn my living. And I followed some divine intuition of mine and of a very wise friend of mine (whom I'll always thank for that) and here I am, 10 years and something later, loving my job and looking forward for my next step.

It wasn't easy, you know. My first salary ever was 20 EUR and I was happy because I could have a mobile phone of my own (bear with me, we are talking 1999 here :) ). My first salary in the communication industry was little below 100 EUR and I still have the necklace I bought from my first paycheck. Now I earn enough to pay my rent and expenses, care for my cat, see a good movie every now and then and buy myself the books I love (not all at once, but still :) ).

I had my fears, failures, dissapointments and draw-backs. I faced humiliation for things I didn't do. I had my years of huge lack of self-confidence. I won clients hard to work with, I lost clients I loved dearly. But I kept curiosity, passion, patience and strong will in my cook book. And, although I still have a long way until the big, tasty cake with a cherry on top is ready :), I think I will make it.

I am not giving advice here(although I have a strong teaching gene in my DNA :) ). I just wanted to speak about the most important lesson I've learned from what I've lived so far: that we have to work on building ourselves in order to become the kind of star that suits us and puts us in the light we deserve.

Well, if you wonder what the heck got into me to write this post, here is the inspiration :)

Good to remember.

"What if you spent one day a week (hey, even a day a month) without meetings, phone or email?

How will you know unless you try?"

Seth Godin

PS. Maybe this way I'll remember to actually do it.

Mischa Maisky or how to put passion in what you do

Thanks to my dear friend Daria, I had excellent seats to the concert Mischa Maisky and his daughter Lily presented to the Romanian public at the end of October at the Athenaeum.

People say that he is one of the most eccentric cello players in the world - looking on the stage, all I could see from the second row was passion. Nothing else. He put all the passion a human being can have in every single note he played.

And this made me think: am I as passionate about my work as this man is passionate about the music he plays? Do people I interact with feel the same about me and my work as I felt coming from that stage, that night?

The comparison might sound a bit dispropportionate. But the answer we give to ourselves might shed some light over the life we live today and what we want for ourselves starting with tomorrow.

Life lessons from programming :)

Because I had this magic attraction to IT and geeks since early youth (and still trying to find the logic behind the magic :) ), I was so happy to find on Dragos Roua's blog the "7 Life Lessons from a Self-Taught Programmer". In a nutshell, here are the lessons and how I see them:

1. Bugs are on you - if it doesn't work, most of the times it's you. It's not a bad thing, that's the catch :) but you have to find it in order to get things right.

2. You have to face a problem, detours are not an option - we don't like everything we have to face, but, although learning that life's a bitch might help to some extent, it's a fact that one cannot live a perfectly neat life. Bad things happen, one cannot avoid them. They didnt' invent the perfect program to set our lives with (at least not yet :D). But the shortest way to restore peace in one's life is facing the problem and solving it. Any delay, detour, lie to one's self that it might just go if we don't think about it...won't work. Ever.

3. Today's problem is tomorrow's laughter - always. Moreover, once we collect experiences and succeses, problems will not look as bad as they used to.

4. Good focus builds good things - just doing things in order to be done and get rid of is not going to provide the solution on the long run. Sometimes I feel the need to let my mind chill between tasks just to reset it and make it work to the fullest again. It might come not so handy when one's in a great hurry, but in the end the good focus will pay off.

5. If you feel it, do it - I used not to do that and thus accumulate many frustrations. But once one gets the taste of it, life will look oh so different :)

6. Be neat - oh, yes. Being neat can be a quality as well as a misfortune. Being neat might seem to take a lot of time and be of not such big importance (since the big picture is good), but this is a false impression. The little mess one lefts behind would errode what's been built and eventually lead to disaster.

7.There's more than one way to skin a cat - I used to get very upset when the solution I thought was good didn't work at the end. It's an exercise for the self to free one's mind to get the right ways to solve things out (and to understand and accept that sometimes the others'minds can give you the solution :) ).

These were my ideas around the 7 lessons - I bet each one of us has his/her own version - play around the lessons and see what you get :) for me it was a good exercise for the mind.

TEDx Bucharest - Things that make me think twice if what I've known about myself is actually true

1. One can choose to live his/her own life or let life live him/her (Oana Pellea)

2. One can look at the world through the eyes or through the mind (Adrian Bejan)

3. One can curl back to bed in a cold winter day... or get up and go run the North Pole Marathon (Andrei Rosu)

4. One can invent the device of the future or re-invent the mechanism of learning through helping the others learn (Arnoud Raskin)

5. One can be unhappy by expecting the world from oneself or lower expectations in order to get the most out of life (Eric Weiner)

6. One can skydive for the thrill of it or skydive to help communities without access to communication means (Roland Hermann)

7. One can go with the flow or stop and get acquainted to one's self (Oana Pellea)

... and these are just a few things that made me lower my head and promise myself that next time I'll think again before saying "I cannot do it".

Gustul amar al dispretului

Am tot citit in ultima vreme o multime de istorii despre neprofesionalismul oamenilor care lucreaza in PR*. Istorii spuse in general de jurnalisti sau de bloggeri - cei mai sinceri observatori ai oamenilor de PR (si,credeti-ma, stiu bine ca nu ar povesti lucruri rele daca nu le-ar fi ajuns cutitul la os...).

Problema sunt chiar acei oameni de PR care sunt subiectul istoriilor respective. De ce ajungem acolo? Ce nu e bine? Sa incercam cateva variante:

1. Chemarea - O ai sau nu o ai. Cum o identifici? Simplu: stii limba romana? esti curios? iti place sa citesti de toate? ai bun simt? stii sa intri pe geam cand te da lumea afara pe usa? Atunci probabil ca ai chemare. Du-te la scoala, vezi daca-ti place cum suna, du-te in practica la agentii in timpul verii, ca sa constati cu ochii tai cat e teorie in ce ai invatat si cat e cu adevarat folositor in lumea reala... A, si daca nu-ti place, RENUNTA! :) N-are rost, sincer. Sunt absolut convinsa ca vei gasi ceva cu adevarat pasionant pentru tine intr-un alt domeniu :)

2. Scoala - da, scoala iti impune o multime de teorie si poate, daca ai noroc de o facultate buna, primesti in ultimul an si ceva seminarii cu profesionisti. Abia atunci parca-parca incepe sa sune altfel meseria asta... Atentie insa: CA SA DEVII PROFESIONIST, NU AJUNGE SCOALA! Ea te pune pe drumul cel bun, dar tine de tine sa experimentezi, sa inveti, sa lucrezi cu tine pentru a deveni mai bun. A, daca toate astea ti se par prea complicate, RENUNTA! :) Altfel, vei fi cel mult mediocru.

3.Primul loc de munca in PR - o, Doamne, cat de multa importanta poate sa aiba asta si cat de putini manageri realizeaza puterea pe care o au in viata noilor veniti in meserie! Si aici sunt doua lucruri:

- Angajatorul: cand e dezinteresat, cand merge exclusiv pe principiul ca meseria se fura sau ca pestele trebuie aruncat in apa ca sa invete sa inoate, greseste cumplit. Fara directie, fara sa le explici macar importanta curiozitatii si a dorintei de a fi mereu mai bun, cei mai multi tineri se duc in balarii.

-Tanarul: in 90% din cazuri va sta dupa tine, angajator, sa-l inveti. Daca nu-l indrumi, el singur va evolua foarte putin profesional, in timp ce i se va parea ca, daca timpul trece, el acumuleaza experienta si deci merita o pozitie mai mare si bani mai multi. Si multi angajatori chiar angajeaza acesti tineri judecand dupa numarul de ani in meserie si nu dupa pricepere...

Daca oricare dintre aceste variante nu se aplica in cazul omului de PR, ceva e grav, teribil de grav. Si, daca nu facem ceva in acest sens (fie lamurim omul ca nu e chemarea lui, fie il intoarcem la manual, fie il indrumam sa invete sa fie cu adevarat profesionist), vom perpetua - noi insine, cei care lucram in aceasta industrie - non-valoarea si vom atrage un vot de blam si dinspre cei pentru care lucram, si dinspre cei cu care ar trebui sa lucram.

A, si las lista de variante deschisa...





*PR - prescurtare de la termenul american Public Relations (in romaneste se cheama relatii publice);meserie in care meseriasul ar trebui sa stie sa faca doua lumi sa comunice: vorbim de o companie/organizatie si de fiecare dintre categoriile care au o legatura, orisicat de marunta, cu aceasta; tot acelasi meserias trebuie sa mai stie/aiba cel putin urmatoarele lucruri: limba romana - vocabular si gramatica -, CURIOZITATE, dorinta de a invata tot timpul, bun simt, atentie, rabdare, diplomatie(definitie personala).

Post despre un Guest Post :)

...pe care l-am scris, as a humble amateur in the world of makeup, pe blogul Ancai, prietena mea si makeup artist :)

Enjoy :)

Influenta celorlalti - manual de intrebuintare

Pentru ca pana acum anul 2010 a fost unul foarte interesant, in care am avut de-a face mai mult cu vesti rele, critici si greseli, mi-am pus problema cat de tare ar trebui sa ne lasam afectati de parerea celorlalti.

Dupa mine, treaba e personalizata :) Adica, de pilda, daca ma trage de urechi un profesionist in comunicare pentru o greseala profesionala, o trec prin filtrul meu cu mai putin orgoliu decat in mod normal, pentru ca am de invatat de acolo.

Dar ce se intampla cu oamenii care isi dau cu parerea despre lucruri mai.. personale, ca de pilda culorile pe care le prefer sau hainele cu care ma imbrac, sau accesoriile pe care le port? Logica spune ca ei ma vad din afara si pot aprecia cu mai multa obiectivitate cum ma imbrac, de pilda. Iar eu tind sa iau lucrurile personal, pentru ca sunt ambitioasa si nu ma multumesc cu putin. Si sa vreau sa arunc acele lucruri in secunda doi, desi poate ca parerea lor are un fundament.

Pe de alta parte, am atatia prieteni dragi care nu vad mai departe de propriile preferinte, incat numai obiective nu sunt parerile lor (sunteti familiari, desigur, cu faze de genul "-Draga, dar rochia asta nu-ti vine bine deloc. -Pai de ce? -Pai stii, mie nu-mi plac rochiile, port numai pantaloni si am o parere foarte proasta despre rochii in general" sau "-Draga, esti machiata prea strident. -Dar de ce spui asta? - Stii, eu nu ma machez niciodata si oricum mi se pare inutila chestia asta cu machiajul"...).

Pe de o a nu-stiu-cata parte, fiecare avem prioritatile noastre in viata: lista de task-uri de la job, copilul, ce gatim la cina etc. S-ar putea ca hainele (ca sa pastrez acest exemplu) sa nu fie printre aceste prioritati, si sa nu acordam atentia cuvenita cumparaturilor de genul asta. Deci sfaturile celorlalti ar fi binevenite pentru ca macar sa ne pastram intr-o zona de bun-simt.

Ce am facut eu - si-i multumesc prietenei mele foarte talentate in ale hainelor care a mers cu mine la cumparaturi in acea luni seara :) - a fost sa o rog pe ea sa aleaga ce crede ca mi-ar sta bine, dar pe care eu nu as pune mana :) si sa-mi dea sa probez, urmand sa-mi explice "pe caz concret" de ce crede ca acel obiect este o optiune fericita pentru mine. A mers de minune, am invatat o multime de tips&tricks despre cum sa caut in magazinele de haine ca sa gasesc lucruri potrivite :)

Concluzia? Nu va multumiti cu oameni care va spun "nu-ti sta bine cu rochia asta", ci intrebati-i de ce. Daca raspunsul se intoarce la ei, nu va bateti capul. Dar daca raspunsul este unul pertinent si se aplica perfect la voi, ascultati cu grija, s-ar putea ca sfatul sa aduca lucruri noi si bune in viata voastra :)